Friday, March 4, 2011

The Unrequited Love Affair

I think I'm in love.

The last time I said that, I think I was talking about my  new house..? But I'm serious this time. I'm fairly confident that the object of my affection does not feel the same way about me, but somehow I just don't care. It doesn't really  matter, I'm learning, when you actually love someone. Just being around them makes you feel all happy and giddy, and one thing I know is that both of us feel pleasant when we're around each other. And some day, I might work up the guts to say something, even if it just results in getting shot down. At least I'll know I didn't go all my life without knowing, which is sometimes much more painful than flat-out rejection.

I have about 17 projects in the works, ranging from knitting a blanket to writing a novel to finishing my stats exam. And the poetry is really flowing. I'm wounded, and it's helping me fix myself, I think.

I have a new roommate, who is Austrian and lovely and throws into sharp relief the disaster of a situation my life was in only weeks ago.

I have a lot to be thankful for right now.


Anonymous Jen said...

Sorry about not telling you where I went or anything... I think I had it up for a while but then I thought the host was going to...unhost me. I won the domain & hosting in a contest back in December '09 so I thought it'd expire but it looks like they didn't delete the account. Anyway... sorry, again.

I'm so happy to hear about you being in love. And I truly hope that one day it'll be requited :D I love new love. It's like a freakin' drug. (it really is to some people)

Do you get the new roomie to say "I'll be back" when they go out of the room or something? I think I would...maybe once. If they were goofy, like me. Otherwise I'd probably just think of it to myself and giggle insanely :D I'm glad you found someone to throw a lil gravity in the chaos. A little leveling goes a long way, I always say. Since I wrote that sentence. If you want...I've wanted to do another issue of Illuminate & I think I might just make it a poetry & art-of-one-sort-or-another collective from people that want to contribute...I'd love to see what you made. I have a feeling looking at other people's work might make me want to do something new with words. I hope.

March 4, 2011 at 10:02 PM  
Anonymous lucy said...

Who is this special someone? I think it's awesome that you kind of have a "oh what the hell" kind of attitude, but I hope that in the long run they will feel the same about you because I think you are one of the coolest blog people I have gotten to know!

I envy your busy schedule, I wish I could to do many things. Too bad life gives us too many time constraints. I'm currently studying for my medical exam to get into medical school so that consumes my life (or is becoming the death of me.)

I'm glad you have a new roommate and that things are working out for you. I remember you post about one of your roommates, which didn't really paint a great picture of her personality.

March 5, 2011 at 5:25 PM  

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